Not Giving Up Just Yet...

Today has been a really bad day...

I feel so useless and so lonely. This depression has done so much damage on me. It hurts so much.

I wish this depression would see that I do have a pretty good life. I have a good job and I am healthy. Just leave me alone!

I feel so tired and defeated. I was doing so great when I got back from my vacation. So optimistic and actually very happy!

I didn't even had to take my anxiety medication. I still don't have to take it. I am forcing myself to keep it together.

But I can feel it slipping out of my hand ever so slowly. I am in this cage and trying to escape, but I can't.

When will I be happy and free again?

Hugs and comments are always welcome...

After A While

After a while you learn the subtle difference

Between holding a hand and sharing a life

And you learn that love doesn't mean possession

And company doesn't mean security

And loneliness is universal

And you learn that kisses aren't contracts

And presents aren't promises

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes open

With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child

And you learn to build your hope on today

As the future has a way of falling apart in mid-flight

Because tomorrow's ground can be too uncertain for plans

Yet, each step taken in a new direction creates a path

Toward the promise of a brighter dawn

And you learn that even sunshine burns

If you get too much

So you plant your own garden and nourish your own soul

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers

And you learn that love,True love,Always has joys and sorrows

Seems ever present, yet is never quite the same

Becoming more than love and less than love

So difficult to define

And you learn that through it all

You really can endure

That you really are strong

That you do have value

And you learn and grow

With every goodbye

You learn.

 

~ Veronica Shoffstall